*if you’re offended by swearing, don’t bother reading beyond this line.

The other day I finished the book ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck’.

It was such a breath of fresh air.

We aren’t special. Our problems aren’t unique. We will all die.

Here’s the names of the chapters (to get you excited to read it!):

1. “Don’t try”

2. “Happiness is a problem”

3. “You are not special”

4. “The value of suffering”

5. “You are always choosing”

6. “You’re wrong about everything”

7. “Failure is the way forward”

8. “The importance of saying no”

9. “….and then you die”

We have become so self entitled. Being humble has been forgotten.

At the end of the day, most of us are wasting precious time and energy of giving fucks about things that really Do. Not. Matter.

We can’t control other people. We can’t control the way they think or act. We can’t predict what their reactions to a difficult conversation will be. We have no control over any of it.

What we can control is ourselves. We have control over our thoughts. We have control over our actions.

We can decide whether to obsess over something someone said, which will achieve absolutely nothing.

Or we can decide to just forget about it. And get on with our day.

We are wrong to think that our problems are new and haven’t ever happened before.

Other people have had their hearts broken. Other people have been divorced. Other people have money stress. Other people have lost their jobs. Other people are tired from raising children. Other people feel they have lost their way.

The great thing about this is that we aren’t alone. It’s natural to worry. It’s natural to give fucks left right and centre about certain aspects of our lives.

What is amazing is when we start to train ourselves to think differently, we realise that there’s no point giving fucks about things we cannot change.

Yes, by all means give a fuck about the important people in our lives. They deserve it.

But free yourself of worthless worry and stress.

Because at the end of the day, we will all be dead and buried. And what matters is how we lived our lives.

Surround ourself with people who make you feel good, who challenge you to be a better person and who love you unconditionally.

Other people will only drag you down or bring out not nice parts of you. Not worth it.

Place value on the shitty things that have happened to you. If you’re lucky, you will learn from them and this will build upon you being a better human.

It’s ok to not be happy. We don’t need to be deliriously happy all the time. Give yourself a break, acknowledge the shit feelings, place your fucks where they belong, and don’t feel bad for feeling bad.

It’s ok to fail. How else will you learn to move forward if you don’t first fail?

Don’t play the victim. It’s not cute.

Don’t be a yes man.

And read this book.