When I was pregnant with my boys, I craved birth stories. I watched birth shows on tv, read other people’s birth recounts. It was like a drug to me! 

So if you’re a bit weird like me, here are four abbreviated birth stories. And they’re all mine. Yep, I’m pretty proud that I’ve been pregnant and given birth four times and survived to tell the tale! 

Mr H. 2009. 

First baby. Crap pregnancy with severe pubic symphysis dysfunction. 

One day overdue. Went for a stretch and sweep at the obstetrician. Contractions started around 3am the next morning. Got to hospital around 6am. Had two epidurals that didn’t work properly, as in I could still feel patchy pain, then complete pain. 

Baby’s heart rate was dropping. Baby was in posterior position. They broke my waters and there was meconium in my waters. (Baby’s first poo. Not a good sign as it can go into baby’s lungs). I was at 10cm but baby was stuck. 

Went for an emergency Caesarian. They put the Caesar drugs in the same line as the dodgy epidural. As a result I could feel the operation starting. 

Very quickly put under a general anaesthetic. He was born at 2:12pm, at 4kg and the cord around his neck. Two hours later I awoke. No pregnant belly. No baby. Shell shocked. 

Couldn’t breastfeed. Birth trauma. Far too many visitors. Descended into postnatal depression. Brilliant…..

Mr N. 2011.

Baby number two. Found the courage to fall pregnant again. Shit pregnancy with very severe pubic symphysis dysfunction. I could hardly walk. 

Six days early, contractions began at 6pm, just before we ordered our wedding anniversary Chinese dinner!

Went into hospital. Labour tracked pretty much the same as last time but quicker. Epidural didn’t work. Anaesthetist put it in much higher than normal and it worked a treat. 

Posterior baby going into distress. Obstetrician said to try vacuum otherwise it would be another Caesarian. Luckily he was only 3kg. 

Born at 11:56pm via vacuum extraction on our wedding anniversary. I bled a lot more then was normal but it settled. Baby needed some oxygen help but he was ok. 

Breastfeeding unsuccessful again but thoroughly enjoyed the vaginal birth and immediate skin to skin contact. 

Mr S. 2013.

Baby number three. Yet another horrid pregnancy with pubic symphysis dysfunction. 

Two weeks early. I woke around 1am with pain but just in my bladder area. I had a bladder infection earlier but thought it had cleared up. 

Called labour suite feeling like a dick. “Hello. This is my third baby. But I’m not sure if I’m in labour or not.” Idiot. 

They said to come in anyway. By the time I got there I knew it was labour. I had two previous posterior babies and the labour pains were all in my back. This was different.

Epidural worked properly. I vomited. Worst part of the whole thing!!

Dr came in and said I was ready to push. (Most amazing doctor I’ve ever had. If you need a recommendation for an obstetrician at the Sydney Adventist Hospital I’ll let you know).

He rolled me into my side and I gave birth with one leg in the air. Dr perched on the side of the bed while the student midwife delivered my baby. 

Two pushes and he was born 3.2kg at 10:22am. Very calm and beautiful. 

Breastfeeding unsuccessful yet again but I was ok with it. 

Mr L. 2016.

Surprise baby number four. Perfect pregnancy. Absolutely no pubic or back pain. Inexplicable. 

Ten days early I had a stretch and sweep. Then drove to Brookvale to pick up the new car. Having sporadic contractions along the way. Probably not the best idea…

9pm the contractions suddenly came hard and fast. Every two minutes. Went straight to hospital. Different hospital to the first three. We had thought we were finished having babies and so dropped obstetrics cover from private health.  Baby four was at a public hospital.  

Very quickly reached 7cm but no epidural in sight. So I freaked out at potentially giving birth drug free and my body stopped dilating. 

Epidural finally came (I told the midwife I was pretty sure I was dying. “No Katey, you’re just having a baby” she says!).

4am I was 10cm. They sat me up for another hour to let gravity help and I began pushing at 5am. He was born at 5:23am. 3.2kg. 

Fourth time unsuccessful at breastfeeding. My gigantic boobs just aren’t cut out for it. Thank fuck for formula. And non-judgemental midwives. 

Four births. Four completely different journeys. And four completely different babies! 

Please share your birth story. The highs, the shitty lows. All of it.  This is a safe place to share. 💙💙